down 2 pounds

I stepped on the scale today and guess what!??

I LOST, yes LOST 2 pounds!!!!!! I was amazed I told DD I could not figure out how I did that with the stress of this week and the eating i did and he said that it was probably from the walking and house cleaning I have been doing. He is probably right, but still I indulged way too much this week.

I have started reading the book again, I am the leader of a weight watchers and dr Phil yahoo group, and the troops needed some leading , so I dusted it off and we are basically reading a key a week and talking them through etc, so I did this because I know if I had to find time for myself to read it I would not have, but because I have to read it for the group, I am getting it read :) hey whatever works

I know I am worth it, just some days it gets very very overwhelming, and I feel like just laying down and letting the world run me over.

Anyway I'm glad that things are getting back to normal here (what is normal anyway)

Roller blades!!

May 8th 2004

I woke up to a 2 pound loss even though I had over eaten abut 40 extra points this week, I guess the extra exercise was working out :) that makes me motivated to do better next week.

We went garage saleing today with my MIL, and got some things, ( mostly for DD of course LOL) but we faired out well with a ceiling fan for 5 dollars and I got a 89 dollar pair of high quality roller blades for only 5 dollars, which excited me immensely :) my roller blades are about 8 years old and were cheap to start with, these new ones will be nice and if it does not rain tomorrow I'll go out for a roll around the BLVD.

we went out to lunch to Honey garlic, our family favourite all you an eat buffet, I had two plates, one full of salad and then one with the small amounts of things I wanted to taste filled with lots of Chinese veggie stir-fry etc. I didn't count points today but I made good choices, then for dessert I had a small apple crumble with a scoop of ice-cream on it.

Now I am eating a veggies and tuna fish and lemon stir fry cause I'm bit hungry and going to bed soon.

Derailed

Monday getting back on track

this weekend was NUTS, I totally BLEW my points. i really need to stop eating due to stress.

I started back on points today, I did ok, but I am battling the urge to just go and binge on whatever I can get my hands on. I hate stress.

I went swimming this evening because H was gracious enough to pay for me to go with her. I am going to keep track of how often she does that and pay her back in some way via favors etc. ( I am making her wedding dress and wedding cake for her july wedding)...who knew I was so talented,lol well actualylet me take a moment to brag, to boost my self esteem., I AM talented, when she was almost in tears because no store has a dress big enough for her ( she is over 350 pounds) i thought that with some modificatons I could make her a dress from a pattern with no problems, I ahve made prom gowns and wedding dresses before. so when I told hr I would make it for her if she bought the materials etc for her, she was very releived, and of course I am good at making cakes, so I will be doing a purple rose three tiered wedding cake for her with teddy bears bride and groom on the top. .. ok end of self brag and esteem boosting moment.

I pulled out my sewing machine and dusted it off and made a dedicated sewing corner for myself and am playing around with some ideas that have been bouncing around in my head recently. I made a little clutch purse last night out of jean material.

I went back to winning points, and I want it to be known that I will not.. make that totally refuse to wrap my brain around flex points... LOL it is just WAY TOO easy to eat a bank of 35 points too fast for me, so I am back to the range of points and banking for each day to save up for special occasions etc. I like this much better, I am used to it and I know it works.

My goals for exercise this week :
Monday: Go swimming
Tuesday : do ball pilates
Wednesday: go swimming or/ do 10 miles on the stationary bike
Thursday: go for a walk for a mile around the BLVD at a fast pac ( 1/2 hour usually)
Friday: do ball Pilates
Saturday: 1/2 hour od brisk wlking ro 10 miles on the stationary bike
Sunday day of rest, maybe go to the park with the family if it is nice outside.
This doesnot include any of the walking I do for gettig groceries etc. I WILL not tell myslef that it s ok to NOT do my plan just becasuse I walked to teh store for bread or the library for a book etc.

My goal is to stay on points this week and try to get in as much water as i possibly can ( cause I NEVER reach the 6 a day I am supposed to have)

try to reread the dr phil book again, i need the boost.

170 and holding

The computer has been dead for a while , so I have been unable to keep this updated the way I like. I am back ohline now and hopefully things will pick up again.

I am holding at 170 pounds right now for over a month becasue I ahve not been eating well and my swimming pass is over and I needed to find other ways to exercise.

well i weighed today and I ahve not lost a pound all week even though I have been on points all week and exercised three days so far as well. I think maybe cause I chart my food from monday to sunday now I should perhaps change my weight in day to monday? I'm not sure. it just feels a little disapointing to have not lost any weight after a week on OP and exercise.

I am trying to look at the positive of it all that it is for health and not necessairly the weight loss. but it was hard not to buy chocolate at the store when I went for milk, thinking with " well it work this ahrd and it didn't work anyway I might as well enjoy the chocloate I have been craving"

I didn;t buy it, but it was a battle.

21 pounds down

I am feeling much better today though this dry hacky cough is driving me nuts... chewing gum a lot.

I was up early this am and went to the store to buy the supplies I needed to make a cake for a client, and came home nad did that. I got to use my new kitchenaid for the first time making a cake and it was nice :) was fast and easy and clean up was a breeze :)

then we headed out to the flea market with MIL. This was a plan DH had for us and not something I really wanted to do , I would have rathered stay home and clean a bit, I'm actually in the mood, so I usualy strike while the iron is hot. so instead I went and got a pair of flip flops for swimming nights . I hate walking on my bare feet on the locker room floor, you never know what fungus is growing under foot literally , so I feel good getting them out of season :)

I tried to eat my 25 points max this week but had a hard time doing so due to this being my first week with the less 2 points a week. With feeling miserable all week this is literally the first day I have had any energy to speak of.

I didn't count the points I ate in sugared cough drops, or medacine in a sugar base, but i tried todrink lots of water and even though I did not really swim but onlty walked the lengths of the pool, I went swimming 5 timnes this week. I managed to get in only 80 sit ups this week, rather then a 150 to 200 i do weekly, but that is ok.

Still I thought with these slow downs and all I would stay the same, nbut I actually showed a loss of 3 pounds. Now I am down to 171 pounds and 21 poubnds lost since January 5th when I went back on plan, it feels really good to have this loss so far and the clothes I wear now are just falling off of my I need to get a belt for my jeans :)

I bought sugar free gum to chew on when I make cakes as well so I won;t be tempted todip my fngers and tast the icing. I of course do do a small taste test to see I have mixed it roght but after that I gowent and brushed my teeth and stuck to gum.

Chocolate covered cherries

Feb 14th 2004

I had two chocolate covered cherries to day for valentines day ( 2 points each they were small) and have been on points all week.though it took some doing, I had some things that were not points friendly that took activity points to cover but that si ok, I made it... I am thinking about having diet coke and rum to loosen my neck and count the points for the rum.

I don't usually drink, but I have tried everything for my neck,so maybe this will work.

I stretched before I got out of bed this morning and heard a few pops in my neck that sounded like popcorn and have been unable to move my neck at all today since, I did something to a muscles in my left side, and it hurts :(

I have lost two pounds this week,so I am now down by 16 pounds since January 1st. :) I'm feeling pretty good about that. all my clothes are looser and it feels nice to be able to see the difference. I keep getting fearful though that I am going to hit a plateau soon... but when I look back at my week and see how much different I am doing now,I see that I am doing a lot of things right now that I wasn't before.

I'm still trying to get in as much water an possible in a day... I have 12 bottles now that I refill every day and try to get john and I to drink them all. I really feel different if I don;t get my water in.
Feb 20th 2004

18 pounds total lost now :)
My official weight in is tomorrow, but I weighed in today and have lost another 2 pounds :) I'm down into the next points range now, 20-25 points a day. sometimes it feels strange to go down the next points range,I hope I am not hungry.. have to work the Ap points if I do, cause some days it felt like I needed the whole 27 and an extra 2 Ap's to feel not hungry.

That weight loss this week was with dinner out to restaurants twice, two nights in a row.. so am doing well with my most dangerous sabotage areas of my weight loss, the choices on a menu. But obviously I am learning to make the right choices and enjoying the challenge of eating within points while out at a restaurant and enjoying more the social part of the experience.

Emotional Week

I only swam for exercisethis week, I did not do any ball Pilates, like I have been dong. But that is ok, I think I needed the break, I was dealing with a lot of emotional stuff this week ( PMS, MIL, PWS ( pissed off wife syndrome))

I had an argument with a Collegue that required a lot of my attention due to her public accusations etc, and also required me to leave the group she and I were a part of,I did a lot of grieving over that until yesterday when my neighbour had a chat and she said "I think you already know what you need to do , you're just sad that you have to" and that made me do what I needed to do, and now I feel much better,more at peace.

This week I learned though that even though I was completely stressed about it all I didn't let food comfort me. I got hugs from some great friends ;) and was able to talk it out with my circle of support,and now I feel much better and able to start a fresh new week.

I lost two pounds and I am learning that it is not about the show of loss on the scale but about feeling better about myself, and knowing I am worth it, and I have value in this world.

Next week I would like to continue to improve on my water intake, and get in some ball Pilates as well, since I miss it.